Kill Soft
by Amber Tinted
Summary: It was supposed to be great. It was supposed to be grand. Kagome's childish innocence sprawled into something unrecognizable. When you lose everything. Everything changes. ONE SHOT. Character death


_Kill Soft_

**An Inuyasha fanfic**

_By Ashley/Amber Tinted_

**_Interlude_**

_Killing me softly._ What a song. What a great song. How quaint. How motherfucking quaint. A long time ago, I would've embraced it, danced with it, loved it, not the killing me softly part but the quaintness. What fucking absurdities. Disgusting. Ugh. A long time ago, I probably would've praised it but all quaintness has left me is emptiness.

It has been a long time since I allowed myself to drown in my sorrows.

They call me Kagome Higurashi. I don't know why. It has always been that way and once upon a freaking time, I thought of myself as that. Kagome Higurashi. What a ring that has to it. I guess it makes things worst, to know who you used to be and still see your old self in the mirror but I grew up, and I dealt with it, big freaking deal.

But then, way back fucking then, everybody used to call me a nice girl, a sweet wholesome girl, the girl 'you would bring home to your mother' girl. I used to be now I laugh at those who dare call me that.

I'm no longer a sweet, wholesome, good girl, that girl, _who_, that girl_, oh yeah_, died.

How sad, let's cry in a damn corner and feel sorry for me. But I no longer do. Never did. Actually. Never. Did. Period.

I came to terms with myself. Who wants to be sweet and boring when you can be bad and _wanted._ Hah. What a joke. I'm laughing so hard that I can feel my brain rattling in my skull. How disgusting.

But that's how it is. Things change. People change. Where was I now? Oh yes, how _pure_ I was. Now when I think of that word and how I used to be, last night's lunch begin creeping up my throat and making its way out. Oh, I have changed. I changed in many ways.

I loved him so much.

Love. Him. Actually.

* * *

"You've done well."

She nodded, taking the suitcase into her possession. Her dark hair, tied neatly in a bun with her red mask, sitting haughtily in her belt loop. The things she has done for a promotion. Promotion gone too far. Her icy blue eyes dropped to the ground, fighting the tears that were misting in her eyes. God, a long time ago. She missed those days.

"Miroku." A smile spread across her face, "That was a long time ago."

"Kag—"

The smile broke, as tears slid down her face, "A very long time ago."

* * *

**_Interlude_**

It doesn't make sense. Why did he have to go? He didn't deserve to go. Me. Now that's a whole different story. At the age of eighteen I began killing people. As a job of course. I'm not some sadist murderess who thinks everybody should go to hell along with me. No, I needed the money. I became an assassin. I guess that's how it began.

Just a job. Ya know. A fuck around, screw around, in the shits kind of job that I just so happen to take. It paid well if that's what you're wondering. I needed the money. Badly. Not to feed my addictive drug habits. No, it's much darker than that.

Three words. Mother. In. Hospital. Cancer. Guess that's four. Sue me, better yet, kill me. Please.

I watched her sit around in a hospital bed, everyday her life lines became shorter and sooner or later, she began gasping to _breathe_. Those moronic doctors just shook their heads and nod saying 'Oh well, in order to put her on life care so we need well over a thousand dollars'.

Are you kidding me? That probably sent me a third class ticket to Hell right about then because of those thoughts that began entering my mind. So I did what the normal sane person did.

_I thought._

Ya know. About stuff. My mother, great times and memories.

I had three options, work at some fast food restaurant and be in debt my whole entire life, sell my body and become a call girl, or murder people. I thought about it. In fact. The thoughts just entered my mind. Of course, naturally I should've chosen the fast food restaurant or maybe the selling my body, but there was no way in _hell_ I was going to lower myself. I did what I had to do.

I choose murder.

And those doctors… yeah about them, I think they are buried somewhere in East Tokyo if you want to pay them a visit, I haven't but I've sent them roses just for them to know that I'm thinking about them and thinking about how good it felt when I heard they necks snap in half.

I still wish I could kill them again, for they can know how they destroyed my life. I wish they can know… I really and honestly do.

* * *

He could tell she was dying. On the inside he meant. The way she gasped every word, like it was hard to even _breathe._ She has done it to herself. It wasn't his fault. He shouldn't even be concern. She killed his best friend and all she said was 'It's too bad that I didn't kill him sooner'. Sadist bitch. It didn't use to be that way. He didn't use to hate her with an extreme loathing passion that would soon eat him up. But now he looks in her icy blue eyes and wish Hell would burn her soul.

Dammit! She used to be so sweet. That was. Of course. A long time ago. He barely remember her that way but what he could remember her innocence used to shine with this kind of vibrancy. He loved her. Adored her even. Everybody did. Even though she was an assassin but she was doing, what she thought, the right thing, and so what if somebody's else's life had to pay because Kagome's mom was dying. It was life.

Life that suddenly twisted and unfolded. Soon to realize but oh far too late, Kagome was a bitch. After her mom died. She would've done anything to forget about her pains and sorrows if it met that Hell had to pay, her sorrows would have to be erase. Life's a bitch.

But Miroku thought that Kagome Higurashi was a bigger bitch.

* * *

**_Interlude_**

It was grand. Being a top paid murderess, that is. I made money. I kept my mom alive, kept my brother clothed and took care of everything I needed to take care of.

It was wrong of course and every murder, each of my morals flew out of the window.

**Going to a university**, _hell_, I said_, I already have a job, why the fuck do I need another one when I'm making millions_, **don't do drugs**, _well ya know, I'm fucking killing people, I didn't exactly want to be in my right mind when I pulled the trigger_**, be a nice, sweet, wholesome girl**, well come on, you know how that one goes… and so on and so on.

I guess, I'm lucky for my job.

I met him.

And it wasn't one of those, twisted, _I'm supposed to kill you but I love you so much_ kind of thing. It was more or less, I was working for him. He was a bastard too. So I didn't feel too bad about my _occupation. _

Inuyasha, that was his name, wanted everybody killed. At least in my opinion. He was kind of twisted. Now that I think about it. But in a sweet, sort of sensitive way. The things he wanted done to his victims, hell even I, the bitch who has a first class ticket straight to Hell, shiver when I think about it.

He was a great man. Well respected and so what he killed those off that stood in his way of succeeding? I think it's called staying one step ahead.

He always did. And you want to know why I loved him so much, it was the little things. I don't know what intrigued me or him either but—it was just this spark. Every waking moment that I was in his office, I wanted to blow his damn head off but I respected him. I never feared him even though he wouldn't hesitate finding somebody to _take care of me_.

But whatever. I liked him all the same.

It took a couple months before the relationship started moving along. Which is a no-no. But I did what I pleased. And Naraku. Well he could kiss my ass if you want to know. Who is Naraku? I worked for him.

**Worked**. He's dead too. Seventeen bullets, if you're wondering.

I wanted to be with Inuyasha and that was how it was going to be. I sometimes wished I never did.

If I didn't. He wouldn't be dead.

Because of me. Because of my sick twisted goals to save my mother. God…

God… can you hear me pleading to you? I hate Him.

God. I mean. What a fucking Bastard up there. Don't you think. He sits up there, watching over us and making decisions for us. Decisions that I could easily make myself.

I really really hate him and if I go to Hell, and I already decided that I am, I hope He knows how much I truly hate him. Not in a sadist kind of way. But in a pure hatred way.

My mother died. Six months after being on life care. They said she was going to pull through… they said a lot of things. But in the end, it really didn't matter. I broke.

I never recognized myself after she left. The only thing that kept me in the light, a sort of light that is about to go out and is twitching, light. It's so funny how life works. I take lives. Lives are taken away from me. I loved her so much and there she was, cold as ice, lying there in a coffin! A coffin for Christ's Sakes. I always said that I was going to die first but nobody knew when but it has happened…

* * *

"You're a bitch, you know that." Miroku said with a pain disgusted feature upon his face.

The cigarette fumes rose higher and higher, and finally dissipated. Her eyes followed the traces of the fumes before staring Miroku straight in the eye. Uncomfortably, Miroku began tugging on his tie, still barely maintaining the disgust upon his face.

"Of course. I wouldn't have survived if I was nice."

"You killed the only man you loved, don't you feel great about it."

"I don't feel great." Kagome replied slowly, "I feel _grand._"

* * *

**_Interlude_**

To make a long story short.

_I killed him._

And this annoying poem. Annoying fucking rhyming poem is rattling in my head. _With these steps I take/I thee wed my bullets until you're dead/I shoot you down/I shoot you around the core._ Oh how sweet.

_I did it._

I had to. Had to.

Every moment I stared into his face, I seen this sort of pain that washed up onto the surface. I have seen the evil deeds that were eating him alive. I had to.

_I pulled the trigger._

And afterwards…

Yeah it's kind of sad but

_I felt grand.

* * *

_

"You sick twisted bitch!" Miroku screeched as he lunged for Kagome.

Without blinking, Kagome snapped her foot into his chin. The sweet crackling noise of the impact delighted her. She couldn't even think. Her mind. On killer mode. It happened sometimes. All she could think about was her prey.

"Say that again." She commanded.

"No." Miroku whispered as he winced again, watching her knee connect with his ribcage, "_Shit._"

"Say it a-fucking-gain!" Kagome yelled.

"_NO!"_

"You'll wish that you did." Kagome whispered, "I swear to you."

* * *

**_Interlude_**

I guess that makes me some sort of predator.

Killing my boyfriend. With some type of glee in my heart.

That's how my mind reacts to that sort of shit.

And it begins going haywire.

Suddenly, flashes of people before my eye came to me. Sango, Kikyou, _Miroku._

Yeah. They had to go.

I already killed my boyfriend, I thought, why not my friends too.

I mean, seriously. If I'm going down. Why not take everyone else on the ride?

So of course, I resorted to a plan. Flawless really. At first.

I really should've done what I thought of doing before: killing them all in one mass killing spree. Of course, I was too kindhearted to do that.

* * *

Kagome began pacing, as she clutched onto Miroku's shoulder, ignoring the crusty feeling of blood underneath her fingertips. It was a pity… Miroku was really such a good friend but he was the last one left. She smiled earnestly, once she pulled him into a corner, giving him one last kick in the mouth.

"Why?"

"I don't know." Kagome replied, her blue eyes still hard.

"Please."

"I guess I want to leave this world with one big _bang_! They'll be saying my name forever. Kagome Higurashi, isn't that that girl who killed three of her friends and her boyfriend too… oh glory. I will be remembered forever. I will give my mother something to be proud of."

"Proud of? Of killing people… you're sick."

"Probably." She began pacing, "I'm probably am. The only people I ever cared about are dead."

"All because of yo—"

"Wrong!" Kagome said, punching Miroku in the nose, "I did not kill my mother! That's sick."

"You're not that far from that."

"Sad…. I know." Kagome sat down, "But it doesn't matter. In one minute, this place is going to blow. We'll both be dead. How romantic."

"In a sadist kind of twisted way."

"I know." Kagome sighed, "It's sad that you couldn't die with your love bear, Sango but things change. Sorry, bitch."

Miroku stared. Looking for the young girl he once knew before. There was a time when she wasn't so twisted and so hardcore on killing. A long time ago…

"Do you want to die?"

"I don't want to live, that's for sure. Listen, don't try to change my mind about things. I have my mind made up. We're dying together. End of story. If you want to escape. So be it but I'll let you know that I can kill a man from a mile away with a revolver. Don't fuck with me."

"Is this how you want it to end?"

"This is everything I've dreamt it to be."

"Kago--"

"You know what Inuyasha said to me he said 'I don't want to do this anymore'. He didn't want to kill people anymore. For some reason, he no longer was interested in killing people."

"Why did you kill him?"

"He told me to… he said 'if I'm going to die, Kags, please, pull the trigger.' And I did…" She gasped as if she was choking, "_Oh God, I did_."

* * *

**_Interlude_**

I really didn't want to kill anybody. At least that's how it began. But funny how live works. It works in mysterious ways. And when I go to Hell, I'll tell everybody out there that I've killed 86 people before I died and I'm damn proud of it.

It'll be… quaint.

It'll be grand.

"I'm sorry, Miroku, but this is how it's going to end."

She closed her eyes and count to ten. Listening to the floors underneath her crumble. She did what she normally wouldn't have done.

She prayed for a better day.

* * *

_Amber tinted_


End file.
